Written By JJ, Singapore
Valentine’s Day may be the season of love and romance for many, but for some of us, it brings pain. It could be a reminder of love lost through a recent break-up or rejection, or the loss of a loved one. And although some of us are able to respond (with a strained smile) to questions like “When are you going to find a boyfriend/girlfriend?” or “When are you getting married?”, the questions inevitably have a way of unsettling our already fragile hearts.
“Time heals all wounds” is the advice we are often given. But how can we move on when the pain fills our minds and consumes our every waking thought? What hope is there when our hearts are heavy and it seems like we will never get over it? How can anyone out there understand what it feels like to go through the seemingly unending hurt?
I went through a break-up recently after a five-year relationship. My girlfriend and I had been struggling for months and eventually realized that our lives were going in different directions. It was really hard at the time to deal with the sudden changes to my life. When I was attached, my instinctive response to seeing or hearing anything nice, interesting, or funny was to share it with her, but now, I no longer had the opportunity to do the same. My feelings of bliss and happiness were replaced by an aching, empty silence. I remember thinking: “What if I cannot move on? Am I going to spend the rest of my life alone?”
Though the days were dark and the nights were lonely, I was reminded through time with God and His Word that I was not alone. For Christ, who came into this world as one of us, had also experienced the pain and sorrow of being rejected, abandoned by those He loved, and left to suffer alone. The Creator of the universe knows exactly how we feel, because He has experienced firsthand our disappointments and hurts.
But Jesus is not only able to sympathize with us; He has also promised to be with us. We may go through periods when we feel rejected by those we love, burdened by unresolved questions, and lonely in a way that no one seems to understand. But we can be sure that God will not forsake us—He will walk alongside us, comfort us, and give us the assurance of His presence.
And that’s not the end of it. Even though our relationships on earth can fail, we can look forward to a perfect relationship in the future—when Christ the Groom comes back for his Bride, the church. The heartbreaks we face in this life cannot compare to the immense joy we will feel at the wedding supper of the Lamb (Revelations 19:7-10). In fact, we can already start to enjoy this relationship we have with Him now.
These truths were a great source of comfort to me after my break-up, and they still comfort me today. Even though I am going to spend this Valentine’s Day by myself, I can rest in my relationship with Jesus, whose eternal love will never fail.
If you’re feeling lonely during this season of love and romance, remember—you are not alone.