Finding A Spouse, According to His Will

Written by Clare H, Singapore

I was in the midst of my undergraduate studies when my first dating relationship ended. It was a tough period in my life as I thought I had found my future husband—it was this individual who shared the gospel with me and led me to Christ. But it was not meant to be; he was only to be for a phase in my life.

After realizing this, I made the decision to grow closer to God and to first seek His ways. I remember asking God to give me two years to have a time of self-reflection so as to become a better individual. And after two years, if it was His will, to find me a spouse, according to His plans for me.

In those two years, while I had never made it an “official” prayer request to God, there were certain traits in my mind which I hoped for in my spouse. For instance, he should be a man after God’s heart, and God willing, his family should be believers too. It might sound like a long shot but I also hoped for my future spouse’s parents and/or grandparents to speak Cantonese and for my mother-in-law to be a healthy eater.

By the grace of God, sometime in those two years, a varsity classmate of mine submitted my resume on my behalf and I landed in the same company as him. After a year of working—with no new friends made and being too busy to keep up with my ex-school mates—I started to wonder if God had heard my prayer.

He had. It was during this period that I started to get to know this very same varsity classmate better through company-wide activities. Chats slowly progressed into dates. In fact, it was during one of our dates together that it suddenly occurred to me that the start of my dating relationship with him coincided with the end of the two year timeline I had prayed for and committed to.

Today, it is with much thanksgiving that I can say I am joyfully married to this varsity classmate. I firmly believe it is no mere coincidence that his mother enjoys preparing healthy juices, desserts, and shakes. She also loves conversing in Cantonese with me, since I’m the only family member who knows the language. And every fortnight, we have dinner with my husband’s grandmother, who also enjoys speaking Cantonese with me. On the weekends, my in-laws will attend church with us and worship our Heavenly Father together.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. —Proverbs 3:5-6

My marriage journey is close to two years now and I can sincerely say God’s plans for us are always perfect, for He is a perfect God. Trust in the Lord that whatever plans He has for you is perfect, whether it’s getting married or otherwise.